How Do I Choose Between Two Good Options? A Book Review
When someone loves Jesus, it’s understandable to sometimes feel anxious about making sure we’re actually following His will for our lives. We encounter situations where we are being asked to make a choice between two good and holy options and that can be hard. Sometimes it can feel easier to choose between good and evil because at least in that situation you know for sure that you shouldn’t choose something evil.
But when we’re choosing between two good options, how do we know which one God wants us to choose? How do we know which choice is God’s will for us?
The challenge of knowing how to choose between two goods is what Fr. Timothy Gallagher addresses in his book Discerning the Will of God: The Ignatian Guide to Christian Decision Making. The goal of Discerning the Will of God is to give you the practical wisdom that you need to make major life decisions with the clarity and peace that comes from knowing that you are following God’s will for you.
Fr. Gallagher is an expert in the spirituality of St. Ignatius of Loyola, who was a Spanish Catholic priest from the 1550s, known for his principles of Christian discernment. Discerning the Will of God is an approachable overview of St. Ignatius’s “three modes” for making a choice between two good options. These three modes are distinct from St.Ignatius’ fourteen rules for “discernment of spirits,” which help us to discern between good and evil inspirations in our prayer lives.
Since St. Ignatius’ original writings can be a bit dense and archaic, I found Discerning the Will of God to be a clear and direct guide to understanding St. Ignatius’ timeless wisdom in terms that I could relate with and quickly apply to my prayer life.
There are three principles or “modes” for decision making from St. Ignatius that Fr. Gallagher highlights. Sometimes we are overcome by a specific sense of what decision we are supposed to make (the first mode), sometimes we experience an increasing “attraction of the heart” towards one decision that is only detectable with awareness of spiritual consolation and desolations (second mode), and other times we don’t have a strong sense of which way to go and therefore we must follow the more practical process of reviewing pros and cons, articulated by St. Ignatius as a “preponderance of reasons” (third mode).
These modes are broken down by Ignatius into different steps and every one of these modes of decision making are built upon a foundation of consistent prayer, spiritual attentives to the “movements of the heart” and a detached openness to the will of God. Discerning the Will of God emphasizes the almost equal importance of the modes of discernment and the spiritual foundation upon which those modes are built.
The book is not merely a theoretical explanation of how to discern God’s will for your life.
What especially stood out to me about this book was that Fr. Gallagher couches his overview of St. Ignatius’ three modes of discernment in dozens of real-life stories of people who successfully used the three modes to make life-altering decisions in their lives. Fr. Gallaher conducted dozens of interviews to write this book so that he could bring St. Ignatius’ principles to life and make the three modes of discernment as relatable and approachable as possible. He offers examples of people discerning different vocations (married, religious and priest), people discerning whether or not to break up with someone, people discerning a major change in career that may impact their marriage, and other nuanced scenarios that you may be facing in your own life.
My copy of the book is littered with dozens of highlighted moments from the stories of people who used to be confused about how to know God’s will but who then moved into a state of clarity and peace, thanks to the wisdom of St. Ignatius. The connection between personal testimonies and practical wisdom makes this book particularly moving to read.
Scripture reminds us that “God has not given us a spirit of fear, but of power and of love and of a sound mind.” St. Ignatius’ principles for discerning the will of God in your life offer a path to the confidence and fearlessness that the Lord is inviting us into as we seek to do His will. The Lord has given us everything that we need to follow Him with our shoulders back.
The principles outlined in Discerning the Will of God are largely based on the principles from another one Fr. Timothy Gallagher’s books on discernment, so check out that book too, if you haven’t already.
To purchase Discerning the Will of God, you can find it below.